Marriage is often seen as the end goal of a relationship. It can be seen as a means of validating worthiness or even a checkmark on the list of successfulness. Finding “the one” can leave people feeling like all of the hard work is done. However, marriages are not that simple. The many myths surrounding marriage can often set many couples up for failure. It is important to help people understand what marriage is really like to avoid failure and disappointment.
Let us break a few myths…
Myth: Couples should have the same interests.
While you and your spouse must have some common interests, you did not intend to marry yourself. Have different interests can bring you both together by opening up to different things and activities that you may never have tried.
2. Myth: Happy couples never argue.
Conflict comes when people want different things, see things differently or prioritize things differently. This will occur because no two people are the same. Each of you must respect each other and take the time to listen to both sides to make a compromise.
3. Myth: Couples therapy means we have serious issues.
While many couples may wait until they have issues, it is a good idea for couples to think about therapy to learn new tools for communication. Attending couple therapy right before marriage can help build a more stable foundation for couples to understand their strengths and develop coping skills to overcome the ups and downs of long-term relationships.
4. Myth: We should be together all of the time.
Individual identity is important, and the pressure to be together all of the time can start to stifle each person’s ability to express themselves healthily. This can then lead to resentment.
5. Myth: Married people have less satisfying sex lives.
Married people often have more and better sex than unmarried people. The emotional connection that is built in the relationships of married couples can lead to increased satisfaction.
The blog is written by :
Yvonne King, Intern MFT