Overcoming Domestic Violence



Victims of domestic violence often feel that they did something wrong. Either they feel like they are too vulnerable, too forgiving, too blind, too desperate, or too stupid to prevent being a victim. None of these things are true. Victims of domestic violence are not to blame. It has physical, emotional, and mental effects on the direct victim and those who witnessed the abuse. The United Nations estimates that approximately 35% of women worldwide have been victims of domestic violence.


There are several steps you can take to recover from domestic violence:


  • Develop love and respect for yourself. This will require that you forgive yourself for the journey you took. It will also require that you set healthy boundaries with all your relationships. Reevaluate what is essential to you and your goals in life.


  • Meditate or pray. Meditation can allow you the opportunity to process deep thoughts. Routine reflection can strengthen your resiliency and increase a sense of hope. Prayer can also be used to calm thoughts and focus on what is within you.


  • Discover yourself. Your courage deserves a reward. Get out of the house. Visit old friends and family. Learn new things. Make goals for the future.


  • Leave fear behind. People may judge, but your courage to leave the toxic relationship shows you are strong enough to handle being the center of attention in some people’s thoughts. Replace the negative thoughts and voices with positive words of affirmation. Remember, you are a survivor.



  • Surround yourself with positive people. Having a solid support group can help reduce fears of repeating patterns. Those people can become sounding boards to allow you the opportunity to process your thoughts without judgment. The people that support you can motivate you and show you, genuine love.


  • Seek professional help. If you are having a hard time working through the experience of trauma, seek professional assistance. A therapist can provide you with tools to reduce negative feelings, thoughts, and fears you may be experiencing. Therapists can also provide additional information regarding community resources that may be available to assist in your progress.



The blog is written by :

Yvonne King, Intern MFT





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